GUARDIAN

I feel every moment’s liquid song ripple through your tearing symmetry.

Chasing stars I’m devil bind behind these liquid bars exploring the galactic sonnet’s inside of you.

I am a blind heaving cupid’s arrow.

I am the everlasting evening shooting star asking you to be mine.

I’ve been dissolved I’m the cure and the drug that echo’s.

I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I'm sorry.

This is my only cupid.

Mirror me mirror me mirror me and they mirror me.

I am the one wishing for you on the far sunless side.

I am the cursed hoping you would take my side.

I am your ransomed sleeping celestial.

I see past the nostalgia through your phenomenon.

To rise I river lead into your distant replications.

Into these mesmerizing comma’s I feel the rip rip rip’s of our heart’s.

Crystallized it beat’s beat’s beat’s and beat’s.

I dissolve and I stumble and I feel you heave.

I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m so very very sorry...

You are my one and only cupid.

I dream and dream and dream and dream

Till every night in this dream I dream and dream and dream of you.

You deflect the blur in my distance mixing in the fracturing nightmares.

The Sleeping Beauty in memory of the magnificence.

I remix every lift to these promised modest intentions.

Feint through every lonely ever after to be with you.

I am the one that reaches for the depths of this sickness for you.

I am the one that loves you most.

But I dissolve in the darkened end but I am your shooting star.

I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m so very sorry Erika Reyes...

You’re my shelter through and till the very bitter end.

Sound: Fracx - In Your Memory
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Happy New Year Erika Reyes,

Everyday I think about my failure's and how you must feel. How I sit with nothing and watch you disappear. How I see you hurt inside of me, how I can't do anything. I write about keeping you alive inside of me. But I rarely write about how much it hurts, how much I force you to stay inside of me. I'm a criminal for you. I would go to jail for you. The weirdest thing right? What they tried to label me. It was strong and good before you know. But after time goes by and everything slowly dies, you realize in a way it was a mistake and it's my fault because I love you. I'm sorry my curse, it would be easier if I just whore'd right? My character is very reliant on clinging when there's a chance. My flaw when I fall in love is I don't know how to stop. In me in this incident it was your kidnapper, my love was your kidnapper. My love can't because I believed. Now it gets harder but I can't let go. I can't accept loosing you even though I watch my self slowly loose and loose and loose. I'm sorry. I'm cruel because I ignore the warnings. I just want to be with you. I want to be the one you spend the rest of your life loving. I always hit this cross roads. I'm stubborn, the porn I can't stop living for a future with you. I can't remove you. No matter the pain and failure and how loud your screams inside become sometimes I just can't stop fighting trying to make you mine. Trying to keep you. I'm sorry I tried I can't. I just don't know how. I don't know how to fall out of love. I don't know how to stop loving you. I don't know how to live without you. Even though it tears me apart watching you hurting inside of me. I keep making you real despite how dead I really feel inside. Do you ever wonder why I can't cry even though my insides are in turmoil. I don't even know how to live feeling alive and doing the right thing even when I see things like you having such a hard time because of me and paranoia take's me. I'm selfish and I love you. I fight them and I forget how it affects you. I didn't know I was going against such a huge anti-christ world. The longer this went it just got harder to believe in you. But I can't stop, I want you with me. I want to be the slave that you will make pay for the rest of your life for what happened to you. I'm sorry I don't know what to do with the hurt and pain. But I'm dead without you, I know because I died emotionally because your not here. I know because I die inside everyday when I see you, when your not here, when I remember you and watch you, I die because I can't make it real. I'm sorry. I love you.

Please! Can I keep you?

Always,
Cyrus